The other day, out of the blue, my five-year old asked if he could spend time alone with me. I was so surprised when he asked. I know about the benefits of having special time with each child, but I still thought Keyan was young and didn’t really think about it yet. I guess I was wrong.
So a couple days later, we dropped his little sister off with Grandma for a couple hours and just did some fun stuff together. It was really nice to have the one-on-one special time and we are going to try and make it a regular thing.
The obvious benefits of spending quality alone time with each of your children is the special bonding time you will have together which will only strengthen as your child get older. I started reading more articles on this exact subject and I found some really interesting thoughts that I wanted to share:
– A Mother Far From Home says individual time with your children can help build self-esteem in shyer children and it may even cut back on attention getting behaviour. She believes it’s the best way to really get to know your child.
– Life Your Way stresses that although it’s important to be connected as a family, it’s also important to be connected to each parent for relationship building. This way you’re communicating to your child that they are really important to you!
– FamilyEducation.com writes that to effectively teach your kids discipline, you need to establish that special rapport and that’s what you get with special time alone with them. Besides, most parents find that tensions dissipate, boundaries fall, and troubles fly away, at least until special time is over. On their site, they also have an awesome list of ideas for fun things you can do with your child when you’re spending alone time, with the strong recommendation that it shouldn’t always involve food treats.
And my final two cents is that these one-on-one times and special dates will create beautiful memories that you (and hopefully your children) will always cherish.
When did you start spending one-on-one time and having dates with your kids? And what do you like doing together during this time?
20 thoughts on “One-On-One Time With Each Child”
Thanks so much for the shoutout, Salma 🙂 And what a little cutie you’ve got!
I’ve watched my sister-in-law and her husband have one-on-one “dates” with their children for years and have kept that idea in mind with mine. We try to take turns with the kids so that we get to “hear” them. I think it’s soo cute that your son actually verbalised his want for a date with you. Just priceless!!
I was surprised when he asked me because I’ve always kept it in the back of my mind too Renata. I guess at 5 years old, he was ready 🙂
Guilty as charged. We have three kids and having alone time with each kid is very hard. But try to always take one to the grocery store or random errands with me. Hoping to get a meaning conversion. It’s hard. Glad for these tips.
I can imagine that with three kids, it must be hard to fit in a lot of alone time. It’s great that you try and do it whenever you can. I guess it’s not just what you do, it’s that you do it.
One on One time with my kids has always been special, even more so now that they are away at University and living there own lives. I love the time I get to share with my daughter or son when i go and pick them up to bring them home or take them back, that few hours of just being able to talk is priceless and something I wouldn’t swap for the world
Wow, that’s so great that you still have special time with them now that they’re grown up and in university. You’re right it is definitely priceless.
I totally agree – I did this as mine were growing up, although not as much as I would have liked as single parent with not much family around. Now they are grown up we do it a lot and it’s made us incredibly close…:)
That’s so wonderful to hear Sophie!
I think it is so important to have one on one time with each kid. I wish my parents had of done that with me.
It really is, thanks Dannii.
I don’t have my own children. But I constantly steal my best friend’s daughter all of the time. She’s my god kid. And she’s a bloody hoot. We usually wind up catching a picnic in the park and playing on the jungle gym. She likes to consider me her “other mother” so I say we count it.
That’s so great that you do that with your god daughter, I’m sure she loves it!
Definitely agree that one on one time is priceless. We’ve also started taking our 4 year out on some of our “date nights” with me and my husband (without her 2 year old sister), and she seems to love the extra attention from both of us!
She must love having her parents all to herself! We are going to start doing it on a regular basis as well Angela.
Sadly, i never had the good fortune of having my own children, but I do have 3 wonderful nephews and a beautiful neice, and I make it a point to spend time with each of them individually. They love the special attention, it seems, and I adore getting to know them as individuals. They are 9, 11, 20 and 21, so it is quite a range in ages, but they are the best! I am blessed to have them in my life!
I’m sure your nieces and nephews love the special time they have with you! You’re a wonderful Aunt for spending that quality time with them.
Oh yes, I totally think it is important. Not just for the child but the parent too! Not to sound totally selfish, but it is really nice to just go out with one child 😉 It feels like a bit of a break from parenting multiple kids. On the unselfish side, I think it is also really great for the child to have that special time with their parent. We’ve done it right from the start and there are certain things that we do one on one. My son loves going to the movies and that is something that I do with him vs his dad. Love it!
Oh yeah, I totally agree that sometimes it’s nice to only have one kid, it’s definitely like a break! We’ve just started doing it but it’s probably a good idea to start with my daughter early now that I now all the great benefits for them and for us parents.