I am feeling tired as I write this post. Tired because I’ve had a busy week. I’m also tired for another reason, my obsession with losing the last 10 lbs of baby weight. My kids are now 5 and 7 and I still have about 7 lbs to lose, right around my belly.
Losing the Last 10 lbs
It’s something that has been at the back of my mind for the last three years. The reason the voice won’t leave is because three years ago, I did it! I achieved the goal of losing the last 10 lbs. I was seeing a personal trainer, working out on my own, tracking all my food and calories and I actually did it. If I’m honest, I was so happy when I did! My clothes all fit better, I felt happy when I looked at myself in the mirror. It even made my relationship with my hubby better because I felt better about myself.

However, soon after I achieved my goal of losing the last 10 lbs, I was in a car accident. It changed everything. I couldn’t workout for a long time. I had anxiety and I stopped tracking my food. When I finally healed and felt better, I became a little obsessed with reaching that goal again. I remember it made me so happy and I knew that if I had done it once, I could do it again.
But I haven’t been able to, it’s plagued me. I get upset with myself when I mindlessly snack at night. I get annoyed that I workout so hard, five days a week, yet see no change on the scale. Wearing jeans makes me feel so uncomfortable because it’s tight around my mom belly. And I’m really tired of leaning over and feeling or seeing my stomach hang over my pants. Plus, how do all those other moms do it? The ones that have three or four kids and still have perfectly flat abs. If they can do it, surely I can?
Letting go of losing the last 10 lbs
Today I’m finally ready to let it go. I’m tired of not feeling good enough and comparing myself to others. Now I’m ready to accept my body for what it is and focus on the positive parts. The other day, I talked to my husband about it and he said, can you please remember that? He has always been happy with how I look, it’s just me who was self conscious and negative. That is over.
I am getting rid of my scale. I’m not going to worry about the numbers. Instead I’m going to focus on being healthy and strong. I’m going to focus on how exercising makes me a better mom and a better person.
Things like the fact that I can deadlift 135 lbs and squat with 115 lbs are what is going to make me proud of my body.
Making healthy breakfasts and lunches for myself along with the kids is going to make me feel happy and feel satisfied.
Getting rid of clothes that I hope to fit in, and being content with the clothes that do fit me right now, regardless of whether my stomach is flat or not, is what my closet will be filled with.
Focusing on the fact that exercising every morning is good for so many reasons, like my health, my endurance, my strength and my mind frame, is why I will give it my all in every workout.
I am so ready to forget about losing the last 10 lbs and focussing on who I am right now. Of accepting my 40-year old mom body that carried and gave birth to two of the people I love the most in the world.
My self-worth shouldn’t be determined by a number on a scale. I’m ready to stop judging myself, are you?
Like I always say Salma..u r inspirational. And I think you are drop dead gorgeous.
I agree with what ur husband says and I am glad you are happy with your body now. And isn’t strong the new skinny??? So kudos to you.
Aditi
http://www.sosaree.in
LOVE everything about this post and can relate in so many ways. Good for you and thank you for sharing!
Thanks Parita!
LOVE everything about this post and can relate in so many ways. Good for you and thank you for sharing!
I can relate to this post on so many levels, except I’ve never given birth and yet I compare myself to women who have and how tiny they are. But having given birth or not, my body is my body. No body is the same. It’s easy to forget that surrounded by images of women who all look the same. But we have to remember what we see in ads is not a reflection of reality. I am trying to see my “last 10 pounds” as a sign that I’ve enjoyed my first year of marriage. I’ll be 30 in less than two weeks. Perhaps I am not meant to be the way I was 5-6 years ago.
This is so powerful! I am so glad you are getting rid of your scale! That thing is SO annoying. Loving all the self-love in this post <3.
Ah! Definitely can relate- it’s so hard to lose the last 5-10 pounds- I’ve still been trying for the past 2 years! You look amazing though!
Salma you look amazing and I can totally relate to this post. I couldn’t agree with you more.. self-worth is definitely not determined by the number on the scale!
This was such a raw piece Salma, and I am so proud of you for baring yourself. Cheers to you and you accepting yourself! You are a beautiful woman, both inside and out <3
Thank you for the kind words Henna, it mean a lot!
What an honest and powerful piece! This is just what I neeeded to read today. Thank you!
I’m so glad, and thank you!
Can I just say how amazing you look! AND WOW, hello, you can deadlift 135.. that’s amazing.
Girl, I have no kids and I still have a little pouch and no matter how much I workout, it still doesn’t go away. I eat healthy for the most part, I know I eat out a lot too, but still. Can’t help but compare ourselves to others. You look amazing… but I know what works for me in getting rid of the tummy is lowering the carbs and sugar, for some reason it works. 🙂
Thanks Nisha. And yes, it’s good to have health goals as long as we don’t make ourselves feel bad or judge ourselves.
I read this post yesterday and did not have time to comment but had to come back today to just let you know that thank you for these words. You look great, I know you hear it enough, but we tend to beat ourselves more and critically analyze very part of the body so don’t realize it, and even when we do, we don’t think too much of it. So am glad to see you not judging yourself by that number. I had gained quite a bit the last one year, have lost some of it but still not where I want to be, but honestly I am more comfortable with my body right now, which doesn’t mean I don’t want to lose weight or I wont put in that effort, it just means I wont make my life only about that. Exercise is important and so is a healthy diet, so those things shouldn’t change but peace of mind is equally important. So indulge in that sinful chocolate cake, or enjoy a nice meal with friends, or skip gym because you want to sleep in with your partner and just enjoy a relaxed day without feeling guilty.
Thanks for taking the time to come back and comment SHumaila. We are really on the same page. Like you, I want to continue to be healthy in my exercise and eating but I don’t want to track every calorie I eat and feel bad if I eat something not so great. Thanks for your kind words 🙂
What a great way to look at health- to focus on how you feel rather than focusing on the numbers! Love it!
As the mother of two teen daughters, I’ve always striven to teach them to be healthy rather than “skinny.” Good for you for focusing on healthy. (and now I need to get back to focusing healthy for myself)
Healthy rather than skinny, yes! And of course as mother’s we do forget about ourselves sometimes.
As so many are saying – inspirational and motivational – and you’re looking great! 🙂 I have 50 lbs. to lose – can’t wait to get to that last 10 lbs! Keep up the good work!
I agree – the numbers on a scale have little, if any, significance. I love your approach to focusing on a healthy lifestyle and being happy, rather than obsessing about those last 10 pounds. Thanks for sharing!
I wish it hadn’t taken me so long to figure it out. But better late than never right?
Thanks! I lost much more than I’d gained after my kids…but have now put it back on for a few reasons. I think you’re right about accepting who you are and feeling great is key. I will lose some again-though much more slowly as I’m no longer breastfeeding-but in the meantime I must learn to be happy each day and the main thing is health, not looks.
And just to add – you’re in great shape!
Agreed, healthy and happy is more important than a number!
I need to try to get back to my ideal weight too. You are very motivational!
So great! I’m right there with you. At 42, I am carrying a bit of extra weight, but I am also physically stronger than I have ever been thanks to CrossFit. Now if I could just give up my nightly wine, maybe the rest would come off. Good luck to you!